29 October 2015


Daniel Storey and David Hartrick are AWOL this week but the Football Fives team is nothing if not a collection of forward planners. The best part of a month ago the two disgraced absentees had a mob-style sit-down with Ryan Keaney and Chris Nee to address a long-term, zeitgeist-defining matter: which players would make up the best fictional five-a-side football team in history?

With mentions of the finest works of football make-believe, the panel takes a different spin on its format this week and each member picks five players instead of answering the usual five questions. We cover comics, cartoons, movies, television shows and soap operas - culture's toilet bowl - in our quest to pick the five to defeat all comers. If we've missed anyone important you can let us know on Twittaaaah.

It's a weird one. There's bickering. There are laughs and, almost, tears. The final team is something to behold but worry not, you won't have to behold it for long; we'll be back to normal next week.

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